Race Report: Indoor Track Meet

Before-the-Race Thoughts: 

So, my husband and I were invited to join club's Masters Track and Field team last year. Not because we're fast, or remotely competitive at that level, but because we're both in the 30-34 age bracket (masters track and field starts at age 30), no one shows up for those age groups at the national competitions, and the club wants those points for the team totals. 

But, seriously, that's why. 

I'm excited about this opportunity. I've never been on a real sports team before (intramural volleyball in college is the closest I've ever come), and I see this as a chance to experience all of the awesome things I missed out on as a kid/high schooler because I chose to pursue arts instead. 

That said, the meet where "no one in this age group shows up" isn't until March. Our first meet is local, and will give us the opportunity to see what track meets are like and practice on a 200m indoor track, which is what we'll be running on at national. 

Unlike national, though, this is an actual, well-attended meet with teams from around the country. Unlike national, the 30-39 "masters" athletes are going to be lumped in with the "open" division tomorrow. Unlike national, I'm going to be running alongside actual, legit athletes... who will finish in about 2/3 of the time it'll take me to run. 

This is exactly the sort of situation that made me shrink away from athletics in school: the fear of not being good enough. I knew I would never be as good or fast as anyone else, and, therefore, didn't think I'd be welcome. I don't like it when I'm not in an alpha-type role. I like feeling confident in my role, and using that confidence to welcome others in, and encourage/support them. When I'm not in that role, I'm incredibly uncomfortable, even if I have others encouraging me (and I had nothing but full support and excitement from everyone at ATC regarding my participation on the team).

I looked up the heat lists, and Googled the other athletes in my heat. All of them are legit T+F athletes. Like, when I typed one name in, Google auto-completed it to "<name> track and field". 

I'm scared of being laughed at. I'm scared of the thin, toned athletes looking at me like I don't belong. It's funny to think at how far I've come in this confidence thing, but how I'm still struggling so much in this sort of situation. Why do I care what they think of me? I'm not there for them. I'm not there to compete against them. I'm there to get comfortable on a track, and there'll just be a few other people there too. Who cares? 

Me. I care.

I feel like a total poser. Like I don't deserve to have a team uniform. I'm not a competitor. I'm a stand-in. 

I feel like this fish.
...only a lot less comfortable with my poser-ness

After-the-Race Thoughts:
So, it wasn't "as bad" as I thought it was going to be, but there was still definitely a lot more to be nervous about than other people seemed to think. We arrived at the meet, which had a lot less signage and vibe of "official-ness" than I thought it would. The whole thing, honestly, was a lot less rigid and organized that I'd imagined. There were tons of events happening simultaneously, the audience wasn't focused on much of anything, and there really wasn't even an audience. 


Basically, it was a track meet, not very dissimilar from the All-Comers meets ATC puts on each spring. 

family track meet morning 

We watched the field events, got our hip numbers, and then just kind of hung out, meeting other masters teammates, and trying to keep the kid ocupado while we waited for our stuff to start. I also got a chance to talk to Coach and ask all my "dumb, newbie questions", like, "do I have to stay in my lane the whole time?" She was great at telling me where we'd start/finish, and a little about these cone things that would be on the lane lines telling us when we could cut in to Lane 1. Definitely made me feel a bit more comfortable.

Jerry did the mile, and it was nice to see him go first. Even with zero training, he still held his own and clocked a sub-6. 

this isn't intimidating at all
(yeah, right)

I signed up for a single event, the 400m. I figured this was short enough that, even on a 200m track, I wouldn't get lapped, but it was a long enough distance that I'd feel comfortable with it; it wasn't going to be an all-out sprint. I also liked the idea of having two laps to help pace myself. 

About a half hour before my start time, I wandered over to the warm-up area... and felt completely out of my element. Tall, athletic guys (the 60m was right before my event, so they were clearly sprinters) were stretching and doing strides. I awkwardly went through my dynamic warm-up routine, and was grateful to see another ATC singlet come over and wave to me. I ran about a mile around the indoor arena, and, when I returned, there were four more ATC singlets in the warm-up area, all supportive, and encouraging. Thank goodness for them, because, soon after they arrived, I had some stressful news.

At this meet, I was NOT considered a Masters athlete, and would be required to use starting blocks. 

I know nothing about starting blocks. I don't know how to adjust them. I don't know where they're supposed to be relative to my line. I don't know where to move them and when. I don't know how to put my feet on them. I was so nervous about this that I almost broke down crying in the warm-up area. Why? Because I hate feeling like I don't know what I'm supposed to do. 

seriously, what do you do with these contraptions? 

One of our vets stepped in and talked to the official, and, eventually, we were told that it would be a last-minute referee decision whether or not I had to use blocks. OK, as long as I could talk to someone on the track who would help me know how to set the blocks up and make sure I didn't get DQ'ed. 

When they called us from the warm-up area to walk to the track, there were six of us: the five masters athletes, and myself. 

Insert a new conundrum: no one else from my "open" heat had showed up. 

Was I going to run by myself? I'd kind of prefer that to running against "open" athletes. 

Would they let me just join the masters heat? That would be awesome. At least there were people there that I could keep up with, or at least be just behind. 

Eventually, they decided to let me start with the masters heat. We got out on the track, did some strides (because that was what everyone else was doing), got set, and then one of the open women showed up. I had a moment of panic when I thought they might pull her and me off the track to run our own heat (nononononononono), but they ended up just getting her a set of blocks and having us all run one heat. 

My heart was pounding in my chest as we waited for the gun. Literally pounding. I was in Lane 2, which was great, especially because this was a banked track (i.e. there's an incline for the outer lanes). I started "behind" everyone except the other open athlete, which was also great. When the gun went off, she shot past EVERYONE, and I found myself in a comfortable third. Third is good. Heck, sixth (out of six) would be good. I just wanted to be within a few seconds of someone else. 

I'd had tentative hopes of a 1:30, but, honestly, I didn't know if I could do that comfortably with my foot (taped it again, and, spoiler alert: it felt just fine running). I just tried to run comfortably, but focus on form. The first lap flew by, but I started to get a little tired by the 300m mark and kind of phoned it in for a bit until I'd rounded the last corner and kicked just a little to finish in... 

1:17.10

Pretty sure that's a 400m PR for me. Woot. 

I still feel like this fish. But I'm totally owning it now.:) 

"I'M A SHARK, MFers."

I'm proud of myself for getting out there today. I could have walked off that track as the very last person, a minute or more after the last finisher of my heat, and I would still be just as proud. It's easy to do things you're already comfortable with or good at. It's a lot harder to put yourself outside of your comfort zone and do something new and unfamiliar. I've done a lot of "new" things in the past few years, and found that every single one of them has been worth the initial discomfort. I've learned from each experience, and become stronger and better for having had them. 

I am my own worst enemy when it comes to this sort of thing. Every athlete I met was warm, welcoming, and encouraging. We all may run different paces, and be at different levels, but running and sports tie us together in spite of that. We are all athletes. 

Here's to more fun days at one of the many athletes of Atlanta Track Club.