I've been wanting/trying
to hit a 6-minute mile for four years. I've failed multiple
times, for a variety of reasons, and been delayed by injuries, losses,
pregnancy, and conflicting goals along the way. I failed again today.
I love the feeling of
accomplishment I get from pushing myself outside my comfort zone. Doing hard
things and constantly exercising my ability to prove I've got more in me than I
ever imagined I did is so empowering. No matter what's happening in life,
running always makes me feel like I'm in control of something.
Every day I run, I've
accomplished something. I'm training for something. I'm making progress on
something. The point isn't to hurry up and arrive at a destination or hit a
goal (though that can be nice sometimes). It's about enjoying the journey, the
continual pursuit of improvement, and conquering the challenges along the way.
Today, I learned what it
felt like to push myself to another level.
Today was a great
day.
Previous
PR: 6:06 (4/8/21, 10/25/20, 10/18/20)
90% Goal: 6:10
50% Goal: 6:04
10% Goal: 5:59
Result: 6:01 (PR!!!!)
so
grateful for these women
training
partner + coach <3
Training:
Two weeks ago, I finished up a six-week plan
designed by my friend and coach, which included: 5-6 runs a week (1 day w/hills
or strides, 1 beastly track workout, 1 fartlek/tempo, 1 long run day, and 1-2
easy, short run days) with 30-40mpw.
On Mile Trial day, I wasn't "in it",
mentally, physically, or spiritually... and ran yet another 6:06 (at
that point, I had THREE 6:06 mile attempts in a row, with one 6:09
preceding them).
all about that 6:06, evidently...
While I wasn't disappointed by the work I didn't
put in that day (and, honestly, was pretty pleased that a "bad day"
yielded such a consistently strong result), I did want another
go at it.
...so Coach had me repeat the last two weeks of
the plan and try again.
Before:
It's been another kind of rough week at work,
and my littlest hasn't been sleeping well. That's actually worked out well,
because I haven't had any time to stress about the mile, or overthink it at
all. I've done well with my nutrition (thanks to strategically timed grocery
trips, meal planning/prepping, and not having any down time to munch
mindlessly). I cut out strength training for the past week because it was
"one more thing" to think about that I didn't have the bandwidth
for.
Similarly, I've let my evenings be a little more
chill, choosing to binge The Queen's Gambit with my husband
after the kids go to bed (which really just involves me falling asleep on his
chest after about 20min, but it works for us) instead of reading code books
(for work), trying to catch up on personal communication, fitting in strength
workouts, or trying to execute anything for my multitude of other
hobbies/organizations like I usually do in that 30-60min timeframe.
I felt good when I woke up (at 3:45, because
that's how my body rolls these days), laid in bed for a bit, and then go myself
going for our 5am start time (much later than usual so that our coach could
join in the fun).
The weather was perfect... well, almost. After
several weeks of mornings in the 50s and 60s, today was a rare 33 degrees with
2-3mph winds. It was just a liiiittle on the chilly side, but I was really
happy about the cold snap. I run much better in 30s-40s than I do in the warmer
weather.
I met my training partner (who literally got up
just to run a bit for fun and cheer for me) and my coach (who I don't think
I've seen for any significant length of time in well over a year), and took a
moment to be grateful to have these two amazing people in my life, who were
literally only awake and here because they wanted to support me.
We ran an easy two mile warm-up, talking a
little about pacing/goals. My goal today was not to run a 6:00
mile, or even to PR, but rather to run (3) consecutive 90s laps, and then see
what was possible on lap 4.
I chose this goal for a few reasons:
1) I've gone out hot and crashed/burned on
multiple past mile attempts
2) Why not try something different?
3) Seeing today as an "execution"
trial of hitting splits instead of a "RUN A FAST MILE" helped me SO
much, mentally
Coach was planning on pacing me through the
first 800m, and then said she'd see what she could do. All I had to do, she
said, was stay with her- let her do the work, but stay with her.
Mile:
Lap 1
This lap felt good, just like I thought it
would. I loved not having to think about my watch, or my pace. I remember
thinking about glancing down at one point, and, before I could, Coach's voice
announced our first 200m split: "45- doesn't get any better than
that!"
I stayed right on her shoulder through all of
it. Around the 300m mark, I saw the back of her singlet: big white letters that
said: "YOU GOT THIS", and almost commented aloud. Then I thought
better of it, because she'd probably just chastise me (rightfully so) for
talking. ;)
We crossed the line just as my teammate said
"90, 91".
Lap 2
This lap was harder, but also still manageable.
I was able to stay on Coach's shoulder, and just execute. As we crossed the
line again, hearing another "90" from my teammate, I prepared for my
Coach to drop off, leaving me to the last half solo... but was so happy to see
her continue. I think she knew I needed it.
Lap 3
The third lap of the mile sucks. You're
exhausted from the first bit, and it's hard and you don't want to keep doing
it. I started falling off of Coach's shoulder around the 100m mark of this lap,
and she instantly knew it, and picked up the vocal support with things like:
Don't give up.
You look strong. Stay strong.
Dig deep.
You can do this.
I wanted to stop. I wanted to give up. Around
the 200m turn, I actually wanted to stop so badly that I started imagining
maybe just falling/collapsing on the track. If I fell to the ground, maybe that
would be a valid reason to stop? But Coach's "don't give up" was just
the message I needed to hear. It might not have mattered if I gave up on
myself, but I didn't want to let her down, and that was what
got me through the last 200m of that lap.
"88," said my teammate as we crossed
the line.
"OMG, OMG. I'm doing it," I
thought.
Lap 4
This was the lap I was waiting for. I'd made it
through the "hard part" of the race, and now I just had to get around
the track one more time.
...and it was HARD.
Coach kept right on with me, and I tried so hard
to stay with her, but I was behind, just barely behind, but behind. I knew I
wanted to be able to kick, but I couldn't kick yet, because I couldn't hold it
for a full lap.
Don't give up.
I couldn't make up the distance I'd lost on her
(only a about 3-4 strides, but still distance), but I didn't let it grow. With
200m to go, I'd hoped to be able to kick. We were at 5:18. 42s to go. I could
do it, but I'd have to GO.
I knew I couldn't keep a kick for 200, though,
and waited until I'd gotten through the curve to start the kick. Spoiler
alert: that might not have been the right call.
I'd hoped to catch Coach on the last
straightaway, but it didn't happen. I did, however, kick my little heart out,
pushing as hard as I could for that 100m stretch.
LOOK
AT THAT BEAUTIFUL KICK.
...and then, for the first time ever, I laid
down on the track, absolutely spent.
Post-Mile Reflections:
I lapped my watch at 6:01. You might argue that
I got my 6:00 mile today. Maybe it took me a second to cross and press
"lap"? Our timer (splits below) lapped her watch at 6:02. Maybe she
started it early or lapped it late? Or maybe not, and I ran more like a 6:04.
Whatever the time is/was, I don't really care. I've used my Garmin for ever
mile, relying on my own lapping skills for my "official" times, and
I'm calling today a 6:01 based on that.
Whatever the absolute number, though, it's a
solid five second PR, and that's huge on a mile.
More importantly, though, I rocked the
execution:
recall
the first lap had the extra 9m too, which means it was a 90s
I'd wanted a 3:00-3:01 800m. Nailed it.
I'd wanted to stick that pace for a third 400m. Nailed it.
I'd wanted to give it all I had on the last
400m, whatever that was.
Laying on the track after the mile, I didn't
think I could have gone any faster.
About a minute after I got up, I was already
having, "I wanna do that again. I can go faster" thoughts.
More Reflections:
- Getting to come home, tell my
kids what I did, and having the little one say "Mommy fast Mommy fast
Mommy fast" while the older one double high-fived me and did a little
"YOU DID IT, MOMMY" happy dance/song was literally the best. The
older one's been aware of my training enough to know I've
"failed" the last few times, but persisted, and was truly proud
of me.
- I am so proud of my execution
today, and so grateful for my friends who were able to be there with me
(and those who I talked to before/after online, too)
- If I didn't give up today
because I was afraid of letting someone else down, imagine what I could do
once I'm doing it 100% for myself.
- I've learned so much through
this mile training process over the past four years, and I'm truly
grateful to be continuously developing as a runner. There's always
something new to learn, another method to see how to I react to (mentally
and physically), different styles and executions, and constant new
challenges. There's always something to work on, and always something to
reach towards, but also always something to celebrate.
- For me, running, began as a way
to lose weight, fight depression, and feel a little less guilty about
eating so many Nilla wafers. It's turned into the single biggest source of
self-confidence in my life, teaching me about diligence and commitment,
introducing me to my best friends, and improving my health and well-being
along the way.
- Yay, running.
6:01,
y'all. :D
literally
burned a hole in my shoes today
guess
it's time to retire this pair...
What's Next?
Um, idk... Trying not to run tomorrow?
lol.
I'm actually looking forward to some long easy
miles in the near future. Maybe I'll try another 10x10 challenge?
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